


she did it for you

by cappuchoni



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Angst, Bring tissues, Cults, F/F, Heavy Angst, The Farm (Riverdale)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-23
Updated: 2019-04-28
Packaged: 2020-01-24 15:29:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,902
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18574318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cappuchoni/pseuds/cappuchoni
Summary: Somehow the Farm managed to brainwash her girl, and Toni is determined to save Cheryl no matter the cost. So once Edgar's true plans are revealed, Toni has to act fast to save the woman she loves, as well as nearly half the town, before time runs out.This story is told in 3 PartsPart 1 is sort of a prologue / deleted scenes from 3x18The main story will be in Parts 2 and 3





	1. to be with you

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know where this idea came from... I'm sorry

“Bitch… I love her. And she loves me.”

“The farm is fulfilling Cheryl in ways you can’t even begin to imagine,” Evelyn attempted to explain.

Toni stepped closer, leaving inches between her and the Farmie, “I find that hard to believe.”

A smirk crossed the taller girl’s face, “Have a blessed day.” She turned and left, leaving Toni alone with a feeling of unease in her stomach. The pinkette took a deep breath in an attempt to soothe herself before exiting the bathroom and heading directly for the Blue & Gold.

“Betty!” Toni called as she ran into the room. “We have a problem.”

The blonde paused the tape she was replaying for the dozenth time and looked up from her notes, “What’s wrong? Is it Cheryl?”

“I think that demonic Farmie is gonna try something.”

“What do you mean?

“She bombarded me in the bathroom and accused me getting in the way of Cheryl’s studies at the farm, and then she said some shit about me not fulfilling my _girlfriend_ like they can. Can you believe that?”

“And you think she’s going to come between you?”

“I think shes gonna try,” Toni clenched her jaw and looked up at the wall. She could feel tears stinging her eyes, desperate to fall, and didn’t want to cry in front of the blonde. Toni Topaz didn’t cry, not in front of other people anyways. She only trusted one person enough to cry in front of, and she wasn’t about to lose her because of a damn ghost.

“It would make sense. That’s what they did to my mom,” Betty lamented. “I think they did it with Polly too. It’s a common cult tactic, isolating their members from their loved ones.”

“Yeah, by making them believe their dead ones are back,” Toni scoffed, shaking her head slightly. She lifted her hand and quickly wiped away the tears before the could escape.

“You don’t think they’d make Cheryl choose do you? Between you and Jason?”

The pink haired girl’s jaw dropped. She knew Betty was right the moment the words left her mouth. “But that wouldn’t work right? I’m real. And Cher and I… she loves me. No, she wouldn’t throw us away.”

“Toni, no one doubts how much Cheryl loves you, but you didn’t know her when Jason was alive. You didn’t see how it affected her when she lost him,” Betty explained gently. “Evelyn and her father are ruthless. If they wanted to break you up they’d use Jason. It’s the only card they have.”

“If that gremlin tries to do that to her, I’ll-”

“You’ll join the Farm,” Betty said as it if was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Excuse me?” Toni asked, taken aback at the suggestion.

The blonde stood from the desk and walked over to Toni, “It’s what they do; they’ll make Cheryl believe its the Farm or you, and to her the Farm means Jason. My mom tried to get me to join, and the more I refused the farther she slipped away. If she asks you to join, do it.”

“Betty, I-”

“Toni, I am so sorry I ever asked Cheryl to help with this. I should have known she’d be susceptible to that garbage Edgar is preaching. After everything she’s been through, I should have known better,” Betty explained in apology, seeming desperate but sincere. “But if we want to save her and my mom, to save _all_ of them, we need someone on the inside.”

 

“Cheryl,” the Farmie greeted as she stopped next to the Vixen’s locker. “We need to talk.”

“Good morning, Evelyn,” Cheryl smiled. “Apologies for missing last night’s festivities. Toni and I-”

“That’s what I want to talk to you about actually,” she interrupted.

“Of course,” Cheryl nodded. “It won’t happen again. I had fully intended on being there.”

“This isn’t about the meeting. This is about Toni.”

“W-what?”

Evelyn took a step closer and gazed at Cheryl intimidatingly, “She’s getting in the way of your progress. I think you know how serious of a situation this is; the Farm needs to be your priority.”

“I have many priorities,” she countered. “TT is one of them, as is the Farm.”

“There’s no room for distractions, not if you want to continue down this path. Are you really ready to say goodbye to your brother _again_?”

She felt the air leave her lungs, “What are you saying, Evelyn?”

“I’ve spoken with my father, and unless Toni will join us, you need to decide who matters most. Your brother or your girlfriend. The Farm needs more than just your time when it's convenient, Cheryl.”

“I… I can’t do that,” Cheryl replied, her voice strained with panic.

The Farmie gave her an insincere smile, “I expect your decision by this afternoon.” She turned, leaving Cheryl standing frozen as a wave of nausea flooded her.

_No._

Cheryl slammed the door to her locker and took off down the hall, determined to get somewhere private before allowing the tears burning her eyes to fall. Not finding any free classrooms, the redhead headed for the gym. She sat on the bleachers, in the same spot she had this time the previous year after her mother caused her to lose the lead in Carrie, where Toni had found her.

She cried into her hands, her voice muffled as she asked herself, “How am I supposed to do this?” The sound of her sobs echoed through the gymnasium. Evelyn had asked the one thing Cheryl never expected to have to do, choose between the only two people to ever really care about her.

“I need to talk to JJ. He’d know what to do.”

_If you choose Toni, you’ll be able never talk to him again._

“I can’t lose her. I just got her back,” she cried, knowing full well how she’d look if someone walked in and saw her crying hysterically while talking to herself, but she didn’t care.

_You just got Jason back too._

“I don’t want to choose!” Her cries grew more desperate, and she struggled to breathe.

_You have to, not even you get to have everything. Pick, Cheryl. Your brother or your girlfriend? Who do love more?_

She didn’t know, she loved them both so much it hurt. Jason had always been her protector. She thought of him as her soulmate, her other half. But Toni, she brought light to her dim existence. She showed Cheryl what love could feel like. The redhead didn’t want to say goodbye to either.

“E-Evelyn s-said if T-Toni joins I can h-have them both.”

_She’s not joining the Farm. Who are you kidding? She thinks you’ve gone crazy. You have to make a choice. Did you honestly think you could have everything?_

“I can’t,” the redhead sobbed. She wrapped her arms around her abdomen, trying to ease the pain that was taking over her body.

_Toni will leave you, just like everyone else._

Cheryl shook her head, “S-she won’t.”

_She already left you once. Next time could be for good, and then you won’t have anyone._

“Stop it,” she pleaded with herself.

_Jason was taken from you, he didn’t leave. Are you going to leave him now that he’s back?_

“I l-love her.”

_You love Jason. All you’ve wanted was your brother to come back, and how he is. Are you really ready to let that go? For a girl?_

“S-stop! Shut up.”

_She won’t stay. You’re doing her a kindness, letting her go now. She’ll find someone who isn’t so broken. Toni can do better than you. Let her go._

“I… I d-don’t… please…”

_If you don’t, Jason will really be gone forever. Can you live without him? You remember what happened the last time._

Cheryl began choking on her sobs as the memory of Sweetwater River invaded her mind. Once she managed to catch her breath, she screamed out into the empty room, “Stop!”

_Face facts, Cheryl. You’re unlovable. It’s a miracle she’s put up with you this long. If you pick her, sooner or later she will leave you. It’s only a matter of time before she sees the monster you are._

“I’m not… I’m not a monster,” her body shook as she tried to reason with the voice inside her head. “Toni s-said…”

_Lies. How could anyone love you? You aren’t worth it. Toni will find someone else, someone better. At least you’ll have him if you break it off with her now. If you wait you’ll lose them both. At least choosing him means you won’t end up alone._

“Choosing him means I won’t end up alone,” she said aloud, her voice dripping with defeat and self doubt.

_Make the safe decision. You don’t want to end up alone, do you?_

“I don’t want to be alone,” Cheryl wailed, completely besides herself.

_A little pain now is better than having no one once she leaves you._

Knowing what she needed to do, Cheryl did her best to compose herself. The redhead was currently a blubbering mess, her eyes red and puffy and her face soaked with tears. She needed to find her bearings, because the conversation she was about to have would take every ounce of strength she had.

Cheryl missed her next class completely.  She didn’t think she could handle being around anyone else right now. Sometimes she missed the days when everything about her was a facade, when she could put her HBIC walls up without a second thought. She had been miserable, but at least she had been in control. Toni tore those walls down. It showed her what happiness felt like, but it also left her open to the heartbreak she was feeling now, with no way to conceal the storm brewing inside of her.

She knew Toni’s schedule, of course she did. She knew her class schedule, her work schedule, her Pretty Poisons schedule, even how many times Toni needed to hit the snooze button before waking up in the morning. Cheryl knew everything about her girlfriend, never wanting Toni to think she didn’t care.

Knowing her girlfriend’s routine had always been a good thing. On more than one occasion she’d find herself waiting outside Toni’s class just so she could walk to her next with the pink haired girl’s hand in her own. Today however, it was a curse.

Cheryl forced herself to stand from the bleachers and began  the walk to the girls’ locker room. Toni would be there, she always arrived early for gym. The redhead felt the tears pierce her eyes again and did her best to bury her emotions.

As soon as the redhead opened the door she saw her. Toni was digging through her locker, not yet noticing she wasn’t alone. Cheryl nervously pulled at the sleeves of her sweater as approached her girlfriend

_Your soon to be ex-girlfriend._

She inwardly flinched at the thought.

“TT,” Cheryl breathed out her name.

Toni’s attention snapped to Cheryl, immediately noticing the distress her girlfriend was under, “Are you okay?”

The redhead exhaled, “Evelyn said I have to make a choice… Jason or you.”

“Cheryl, Jason’s a ghost. I’m right here. You love me,” Toni reminded her. The shorter girl’s eyes were full of sorrow, but not of surprise. She had a feeling this would happen, she had been prepared, but expecting it didn’t make it hurt any less.

The taller girl shook her head and tried to fight back her tears. She failed as a single teardrop fell down her cheek as she spoke, “I’m sorry, Toni. I do love you, but I’ve loved Jason my whole life.”

Without waiting for a response, Cheryl nodded and turned to leave. She didn’t want to see the damage she caused. It hurt enough without seeing Toni cry because of her.

Before she even had the chance to face the door, Toni reached to stop her, “Cheryl, I’m not gonna let this happen. There has to be a way you can be with me… and Jason.”

The redhead sniffled, “There is. If you’re willing to open your mind to it.”

“Whatever it takes,” the pinkette assured. “I’m not letting you go again, not ever.”

Cheryl hadn’t allowed herself to imagine a scenario where Toni fought for her, and now that it was happening she instantly felt pounds lighter, as if a weight had suddenly been removed from her chest. Maybe she could have it all. Her brother _and_ her girlfriend. “Will you come with me to the Farm after school and meet Edgar?”

Toni gave a weak smile then nodded, “Of course, babe.”


	2. to save you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did I mention I'm sorry? Because I am so sorry y'all... you have no idea what you're in for with this chapter. Were just jumping straight into this shit. Did you bring the tissues I recommended in the tags? If not go grab them real fast bc you're gonna need them. SERIOUSLY I'M SORRY FOR THIS OKAY?!?!!

Six weeks of being undercover and Toni was no closer to a solution than the day she joined. Betty and her had been in touch daily, brainstorming ways to break whatever spell their loved ones were under. She had to admit, she understood the draw. Edgar was an attractive man and an incredibly smooth talker, but the pink haired girl saw right through his facade. Every time he opened his mouth she grew angry thinking of how the con artist managed to deceive so many people, her girl in particular.

Cheryl was still as devoted as ever. Almost nightly they’d lay in bed at Thistlehouse, and Toni would nod along as her girlfriend told her about her most recent conversation with her brother, her  _ dead _ brother. She hated lying to Cheryl, but she knew if she didn’t go along with with the whole “Jason is alive” thing she’d lose her.

The one good thing to come out of the nightmare was watching Cheryl get to spend real time with her niece and nephew. Whenever they were at the Farm they’d stop by Polly’s room and visit with Juniper and Dagwood. Toni had never been a fan of babies. In fact, she had often referred to them as useless little shit factories. Yet, watching Cheryl interact with the twins pulled at her heartstrings. Suddenly the girl who never wanted children couldn’t help but picture a life, one in the  _ very _ distant future, where it was  _ their _ babies the redhead was playing with. 

The twins weren’t with them now. They were with all the other young children in the Farm’s complementary daycare center while the teen and adult members found themselves gathered for the weekly mandatory meeting. Although they weren’t  _ technically _ mandatory, Toni had the strong sense missing one would result in some sort of consequence, ones similar to what happened when she had convinced Cheryl to skip a meeting right before Evelyn’s ultimatum. 

She pulled her phone out of pocket and huffed as she saw the time. Typically Edgar was the epitome of promptness, but tonight’s meeting was already eight minutes behind schedule. “Is this like school where if the teacher is more than fifteen minutes late you can just leave?”

“Funny as always, TT,” Cheryl retorted, rolling her eyes dramatically, “but no. The meeting will begin soon I’m sure. Eddie probably just had some important business to attend to, that’s all.”

Toni inwardly gagged at the nickname. She then turned her attention back to her phone, unlocked it, and began to scroll through Twitter.  

“Do you really have to do that now?”

The pink hair girl shrugged, “I’m bored. At least this way I can entertain myself with dumb cat videos.”

“You really can be incorrigible sometimes.”

Smirking, Toni turned her head to meet her girlfriend’s judgemental gaze, “You love me for it.”

“Perhaps,” Cheryl replies, her lips turning upwards into a subtle grin. 

Just as Toni leaned in to say something suggestive, the sound of a door closing drew her attention. Her head turned to see Edgar making his way towards the middle of the raised platform at the front of the room. 

“Greetings,” he addressed the gathered Farmies. “I am glad so many believers here tonight. This is truly a…  _ special  _ night.”

“Cher, do you know what he’s talking about?” Toni whispered the question to her girlfriend who was sitting besides her in the front row, attention fixed on the cult leader speaking from the front of the room.

The redhead glanced to her side to shush her girlfriend. “No, but I am trying to listen and find out.”

Toni rolled her eyes once Cheryl looked back ahead of them, her attention once again on Edgar. Each passing day had the pinkette growing increasingly annoyed with the hold the Farm had on her girl. She hoped they could find an answer soon so she could get Cheryl and her family as far away from these crazies as possible.

“Before I go into detail on why, I am afraid I have some troubling news,” he continued. For a moment Toni was worried she had been found out, but the reality of the situation was even worse.

“It has been my privilege to reunite so many of you with your loved ones,” he looked around the room as he spoke, eyes fixed on members of the Farm as he spoke the names that would resonate with them. He turned his head to look at Alice, who stood proudly next to him, “Charles.” From there he looked to Cheryl and Polly, who was sitting on the opposite side of the redhead as Toni, “Jason.” The girls smiled, and Cheryl gave her cousin’s hand a gentle squeeze. Edgar continued looking around, “Joaquin, Midge, Janet, Conner, Beth, Gertrude, Samuel, and all  _ so _ many others. I have experienced so much… so much  _ love _ from you all, and I thank you for allowing me to be part of the connections you have with the ones you’ve been visiting. I wish you could continue seeing with them forever, but the time has come where they must leave again.”

Toni felt Cheryl stiffen besides her. She looked to her side to see the redhead’s eyes open in panic. All around her there were expressions of outrage and fear, no one wanting to experience losing their loved ones again.

“Settle down, please. Hope is not lost, dear friends. As you know, the goal here at the Farm is to achieve a greater sense of self, to ascend to a higher purpose. I am so  _ so _ proud to announce that moment is upon us. For it is through ascending that we can follow them. You have all been doing so well in your studies, and I know you are ready, all of you.”

“Cher,” Toni looked to her, panic across her face.

Once again, Cheryl shushed her and scolded through clenched teeth, “Not now, TT.”

“Retreat to your quarters; at sundown we will begin the ascension,” Edgar continued. “For those members who live off the premises please feel free to use one of the unoccupied bedchambers or any of the classrooms. Now is the time to prayer and reflection. We will reconvene here in forty five minutes.”  Edgar stepped down from from the raised platform and exited out the side door.

“I can show you where you can find an available room. There’s actually quite a few unclaimed ones on the way to the daycare, and I’m heading that direction anyways,” Polly turned to say with a smile. They followed the eldest Cooper daughter out of the meeting hall and through the halls of the former Sisters of Quiet Mercy as she led them to an unclaimed room. “I’ll see you both soon,” the blonde said with a smile as she pulled the door shut behind her.

“Cheryl, we need to get out of here now,” Toni exclaimed as soon as they were alone.

“What are you talking about? We can’t leave. I have to ascend to go home with Jason.”

“Cher...”

“Don’t worry, TT, you can come with me. We can ascend together,” Cheryl told her, seeming genuinely excited about the idea. 

Toni ran her hand through her pink streaked hair and sighed. “Babe… don’t you get what ascending is? He’s going to kill everyone.”

Cheryl stepped back in shock, “That’s an awful thing to say. You know Edgar and the Farm have been nothing but kind to us. Where is this coming from?”

The shorter girl grabbed hold of the redhead’s hands. “Please, baby, we have to go. We have to get out of here,” she pleaded. 

“Toni, I  _ will _ ascend.”

“ _ Please _ . You have to listen to me. We need to leave. We need to call Bet-”

“Call  _ Betty _ ?” Cheryl cut her off. “You’re working with cousin Betty?”

“Babe.”

“You never really joined the Farm did you? You’ve been spying for her this whole time,” Cheryl accused.

“It's a good thing I did! Baby, please. Listen to me!”

“I’m going to go find a different room. If you choose to come with me I will see you in the meeting room when it's time, but I  _ am _ ascending. I hope we can do it together” Cheryl fought back the angry tears stinging her eyes, turned away from her girlfriend, and exited the room.

Toni stood petrified as she watched the door close behind Cheryl. Somehow the situation continued to get worse. Now she and Cheryl were fighting. The last thing they needed right now was an argument, not when lives were on the line. She realized it wasn’t just Cheryl’s life at stake, it was Betty’s mom’s, her sister’s, the babies’, Fangs’s, Kevin’s. 

The pink haired girl reached into her pocket and pulled out her phone to find Betty’s number. She hit the call button and raised it to her ear.

“Hi, you’ve reached Betty Cooper. I’m not available right now, but I will return your call as soon as possible,” came through the speaker followed by a loud beep.

“Betty, pick up your damn phone! Shit’s going down  _ now _ . Evernever is talking about ascending and going home with the dead people. I’m fucking scared, and I can’t get Cheryl to leave,” she cried into the phone before hanging up. Just as she’s about to dial another call, this one to 911, the door reopened and she saw standing before her with tears down her face.

“Cher? Are you okay?” Toni tossed her phone on the bed and ran to her, immediately pulling the redhead into an embrace.

“Please come with me,” Cheryl cried into the shorter girl’s shoulder. “I have to go, but I don’t want to go without you.”

Toni wasn’t a religious person, but in that moment she silently prayed to any deity that was listening for some sort of miracle. She took a shaky breath and fought back tears that desperately wanted to fall.

The redhead unwrapped herself from Toni’s protective arms and lifted a hand to wipe her face. “If this is goodbye, please at least tell me. When I left… I couldn’t leave without knowing.”

“I’m not leaving you, okay? There is no way I’m leaving you alone here,” Toni assured.

“Good,” Cheryl smiled. “We should go.” The redhead took Toni’s hand in hers and pulled her out of the room. 

“Wait, my phone,” Toni stopped walking, turning to make an attempt at returning to the room.

“You won’t need your phone. Come on,” she urged. “Alice just told me Edgar wants me there early. He has a special role for me during the ascension.” 

The shorter girl sighed, “Baby, please. Let’s go back. I’ll grab my phone, and we can talk.”

“You really don’t want to do this with me, do you?”

“I don’t want  _ you _ to do it. Please,” Toni begged again.

“I’m going Toni. This is what has to happen for me to be with Jason. You told me I could have the both of you,” Cheryl reminded her. “Didn’t you mean that?”

“Cher…  _ please _ , you know how much I love you.”

“I love you too, Toni, but did you mean that or not?”

The pinkette closed her eyes and swallowed the lump stuck in her throat in an attempt to compose herself. She didn’t see a way out of this situation. The only thing she could do was to stay with Cheryl and hope she could figure something out. “Of course I meant it. Let’s go.” She took the redhead’s hand in her own, and they walked back to the meeting room.

When they arrived Alice, Polly, Kevin, Fangs, and the twins were already there, the later sleeping in their strollers to the side of the raised platform. Everyone else was huddled around the altar sitting in the middle of the platform. 

“Good, you’re here,” Alice smiled. “Edgar and Evelyn will be here shortly. He had to finish with the preparations.”

“Excellent,” Cheryl responded. “We’re ready. Right, babe?”

Toni nodded, an insincere smile on her lips. 

“That’s great to hear, Cheryl,” Edgar said, announcing his presence. He and Evelyn had entered silently through the side door he vanished through earlier. “We are just about ready.” He carried a box to the altar, sat it down, and began to unpack its contents. Toni watched in horror as two hauntingly familiar silver chalices were revealed. 

“Edgar, what are those doing here?” Alice asked, her eyes growing wide with concern.

He smiled, “These are ceremonial for the ascension. We will drink from them, and the journey we have been working towards will be complete.”

“But those are from Gryphons & Gargoyles,” she pressed on.

“The cups are just merely vessels. I found them in storage, and thought they looked perfect for such an important occasion. However, our congregation is much too large for everyone to drink from these. They will just be for us, for everyone else I have the ceremonial plastic cups,” he said with a chuckle as he pulled out multiple stacks of short, solid black, plastic cups.

“Cheryl,” Toni turned to her girlfriend again, “you can’t drink from those.”

“It’s a  _ cup _ , Toni. Will you please stop?”

“The rest of our friends should be arriving shortly. We should get in our places.” Edgar turned to Cheryl, “I was hoping you would lead us when the time comes.”

“I would be honored, Mr. Evernever.”

“Perfect, thank you, Cheryl. I will hand you the chalice. You will drink first, and then quickly pass it. Once you’ve done that everyone will follow. I will of course explain again this once they arrive.”

“Understood,” she smiled. The redhead truly believed he was giving her a great honor, rather than a death sentence. 

Everyone stood off the the side as the rest of the Farm began to filter into the room.

Toni looked to her girlfriend. At this point asking felt like a lost cause, but she was running out of time. She didn’t want to die, and even more so, she didn’t want Cheryl to die. “Babe, what are you expecting ascending to be?”

“I don’t really know. I think it will be like being above everything,” Cheryl answered as if she was lost in a daydream. “Mundane things won’t matter anymore, and I’ll be able to visit my brother wherever and whenever I want. It will be peace, transcendance.”

“That’s not possible,” Toni urged. “You have to know what you’re saying isn’t possible.”

“Everyone thought it wasn’t possible for Jason to be alive, but I’ve seen him. He  _ is _ alive, Toni, and I won’t lose him again.”

“I know, Cher.”

Before Toni knew it the pews were once again filled with Farmies. Edgar was taking his place at the center of the raised platform in front of the altar. Without her realizing four opaque pitchers had made an appearance besides the cups and chalices. 

_ This is really happening. Oh God. _

“Welcome back. It is time. This is what we’ve been working towards,” Edgar announced, a smile across his face that made Toni’s stomach turn. 

She looked to Cheryl again helplessly. The redhead was eating up every word the cult leader spews. Toni looked around and saw everyone watching with similar revenant expressions. 

“Everyone please come forward and collect a cup containing the libations from one of the members of my inner circle. Do not drink it yet, as we will all ascend together in a few minutes.”

Lines formed as Farmies came forward to receive a cup from men Toni had never seen before, all athletically built and dressed head to toe in bright white. The scene reminded her of a Catholic mass with everyone lining up to receive communion. She had gone once with an ex in Freshman year. The irony of being reminded of Catholicism's symbolic reenactment of the Last Supper was not lost on her.

“Now that everyone has a cup we will begin. Cheryl Blossom has become a beacon in this community in the short time its been since she joined. It seems appropriate for her to lead us now,” Edgar explained. He extends a hand to Cheryl, who takes a step towards him. 

Toni reached out and grabbed her girlfriends wrist. “Please, Cheryl. Don’t,” Toni begged again. “Don’t drink it.”

”You’re being ridiculous,” the taller girl reittered as she pried herself from Toni’s grasp. Once free she walked towards Edgar and accepted the chalice he was offering.

Toni watched in horror. She looked around the room, her eyes pleading for someone to put a stop to this, but there was no help to be found. The room was filled with brainwashed Farmies, and the pinkette was forced to accepted that Betty never heard her message. She was on her own and out of time.

“May the one become many, and the many one,” Cheryl announced proudly, holding the chalice out in front of her. She began to pull it back and raise it to her mouth; the metal barely brushed her lips when it was snatched from her gasp. The redhead turned to see her girlfriend, arm outstretched, holding the cup as far away from her as possible. “Toni!”

“I can’t let you drink this, Cheryl.” Toni shook her head back and forth.

Edgar tilted his head and gave her a sly smile, “We have plenty, Toni. If you dump that we can just pour more. Please give it back to Cheryl so we can continue.”

Toni knew giving it back meant her girlfriend would drink from it. If she dumped it they’d pour more, and Cheryl would drink that. There was only one way Toni could think of to make her girlfriend see the truth, only one way to save her, to save all of them. Tears pooled in her eyes as she gave Cheryl a watery smile. “I’m sorry,” she said right before bringing the cup to her lips and downing its contents. 

The fruity smell invaded her senses, along with a subtle scent of bitter almonds, and the flavor of the blue-raspberry Fresh-Air hit her tastebuds. Toni felt the liquid in her mouth, and every fiber of her being was screaming at her to spit it out. She looked to Cheryl; the redhead looked annoyed with her hands on her hips. Not being able to hold them back any longer, her tears cascaded down her face as Toni swallowed and felt the poison burn down her throat.

“See, TT, everything is fine. Now if you don’t mind,  _ I _ was supposed to go first,” Cheryl rolled her eyes with a huff. 

The shorter girl lost her grip on the chalice. It fell from her hand and hit the ground with an echoing clank. She stumbled, clearly unsteady on her feet.

“Toni?” Cheryl’s eyes widened as her girlfriend fell forward. She lunged forward as Toni collapsed into her arms. “Toni!” She cradled the girl in her arms as she dropped to her knees.

“Cher,” Toni breathed out looking up at the the redhead. She coughed, a tiny amount foam appearing between her blue lips.

“No, no, no. What’s happening?” 

“She’s ascending,” Edgar spoke from behind her. 

“She’s dying!” Cheryl barked, tears flooding her eyes. “Baby, hold on, please.”

The reality wasn’t lost on Alice. She turned to Edgar in panic, “Edgar, what is this? What’s happening?”

"This is what we have been working towards. We are all going to ascend, and you can be with Charles forever."

“By dying?” she asked.

He didn’t answer. Edgar’s eyes were fixed on the scene playing out on the floor in front him, seeming proud as he watched the crying redhead desperately clinging to her girlfriend.

Toni could feel her heart racing. The room was spinning. Her head felt like it was in a vice. Each breath she took was more difficult than the last. Using every ounce of strength she could muster to lift her hand to gently cradle Cheryl’s cheek. She noticed was the feeling of moisture under her fingers; Cheryl was crying. “Don’t… cry…”

“You can’t leave me, Toni. You promised I’d never be alone. You have to be okay. You hear me?”

The shorter girl’s arm felt as if it was made of led, and it soon became too difficult to hold it up. Her hand fell from her girlfriend’s face to her side, hitting the ground besides her with a soft thump. 

“Somebody help!” Cheryl looked into the crowd of Farmies. “Anyone, please! Can’t you see what’s happening?”

Her pleas were met with mixed reactions. Half of the cult members looked on in awe, truly believing they were witnessing an ascension. The other half seemed to have abruptly come to the same terrifying reality Cheryl had. The Farm meant for them to die, all of them, in a mass suicide, and they were witnessing the first casualty. Apart from Cheryl, no one seemed more affected by the horrifying situation than Fangs, who was watching his once sister die before his eyes.

“We need to get her out of here,” Kevin said, pulling Fangs out of his trance. “We can take my truck. Get her to the hospital.”

The Serpent ran over and fell to his knees, “I’m so sorry, Tiny.” He looked to the redhead desperately. “Let me take her.” Cheryl nodded shakily in response. Before he could transfer her into his arms he was violently pulled back away from the pair. 

“Cheryl, you need to let her ascend,” Edgar instructed, his voice eerily calm.

She looked up to see Fangs, as well as Kevin, being restrained by two of the larger men of the Farm. Cheryl didn’t recognize them; the first time she had seen them was moments earlier when they appeared to hand out the poisonous concoction. 

Her breathing became more rapid as she returned her attention to the girl in her arms. “I… baby…” Tears flowed freely from her eyes, falling from her face onto Toni below. “I’m so sorry. Don’t… you can’t leave me… not you.”

“I… l-love,” Toni found it increasingly harder to breathe, let alone speak. She needed to get the words out. If this was her last chance to say anything in this lifetime she needed it to be these words. “I l-love… love… you, C-Cher.”

“No,” the redhead sobbed. “Don’t you leave me. Baby, hold on. I’m here. I’m so sorry. This is my fault. You… you saved me.” 

Toni’s body began to convulse in Cheryl’s arms. The redhead tightened her grip as tears continued to stream down her face. She screamed in agony, the sound echoing off the walls. The redhead hated herself nearly as much as she hated Edgar at that moment. If it wasn’t for her Toni would be fine. The girl she loved was dying because she joined the farm for  _ her.  _ She was poisoned to save  _ her  _ life. If Toni had never met Cheryl she’d be safe right now, instead of being held in the redhead’s arms as her life continued to drain from her spasming body. 

“No!” Screamed Fangs as he struggled to free himself in hopes of reach the girl he viewed as his sibling. Regret flooded him for not making an effort after Toni had been kicked out of the Serpents. He was bitter about what was said that night and allowed his pride get in the way. Now he was watching her die knowing he never mended their relationship, never having told her she was still his family. 

“Cher…” Toni breathed out as her body settled. She could no longer get her eyes to stay open. She tried; she didn’t want to go without seeing Cheryl’s face one more time. It took all she has to force her eyelids open. 

“Shhh, b-baby,” Cheryl shushed her. “Save you s-strength. I’ve got you.” She leaned down and kissed Toni’s brow. “I love you s-so much. Y-you’re the m-most import-important p-person in m-my life, Toni. D-don’t go.”

The pink haired girl felt the darkness’s grip on her growing stronger. It was pulling her down, away from the warmth of Cheryl’s lips pressing against her forehead over and over. Away from the feel over the redhead’s arms holding her close. Away from the light. Away from everything. 

The door was kicked open, and a loud booming noise filled the room as it slammed into the wall. Cheryl didn’t look up to see what the commotion was, her only priority was Toni. If she only had a few moments left with her she wouldn’t waste them on anything else. 

“Mom!” Betty yelled as she pushed through the crowd towards the front where her mother stood in shock next to Edgar. Upon reaching her she placed a hand on each shoulder, shaking her slightly, “Mom, are you okay? Did you drink any of it?”

Alice shook her head, pointed to the flood in front of her, and spoke so softly Betty almost didn’t hear, “T-Toni.”

Betty’s head snaps to look over her shoulder where she immediately see’s a sobbing Cheryl holding Toni’s seemingly lifeless body. “Over here!” She calls out. “Hurry!”

“Cheryl,” Betty places her hand on her cousin’s shoulder. “Can you hear me?”

The redhead nodded in reply as her body shook with her cries. She couldn’t find her voice. Cheryl felt her will to speak, her will to live, her will to exist dying with her girlfriend. How could she have ever thought she could be happy without her? How had she let Evelyn talk her into breaking up with Toni for Jason? She held on to a ghost and almost threw away the best thing to ever happen to her. Did she ever really expect Toni to let go? Toni, who broke into this very building to save her from conversion therapy before they were even a couple? The girl who taught her what it meant to be loved and cherished? The girl who wouldn’t give up on her even after Cheryl had tried to banish her from school? Toni joined the Farm rather than lose Cheryl, and because of her Toni was losing her life. 

“How long has she been unconscious? Is she breathing?”

“B-bar-barely,” the redhead forced out.

“Thank God,” Betty exhaled. “We’re going to save her. Okay, Cheryl? We’re not letting her die.”

She looked up and opened her eyes, searching Betty’s face for confirmation that what she just heard was true. “Y-you won’t?”

“FP has the antidote, okay?” The blonde smiled reassuringly, doing her best to ignore her own panic and stay strong for her cousin. 

Cheryl nodded in response before turning her attention back to Toni, “H-hear that b-baby? You’re g-gonna b-be fine.” She brushed a strand of pink hair aside and pressed a lingering kiss to her girlfriend’s brow.

“Betty? Where are you?” FP’s voice called out. 

“Down in front!”

“Who needs th-“ his eyes fell to see Toni completely still in Cheryl’s arms and all color drained from his face. He froze, his expression haunted. “No...”

“Hurry!” Betty yelled, snapping him out of his pause. 

The man wasted no further time; he unwrapped a sterile needle as he crouched down to stick the cannula into Toni’s skin. FP held the a premixed solution in the air as its contents flowed down a tube and into her arm. “The ambulances are about five minutes out. Has anyone else been poisoned?”

“N-no,” Cheryl croaked out as she shook her head. “It was s-supposed to be m-me. She s-saved me.”

Betty didn’t know how to respond. She wanted to check on her mom, but knew this was the place she was most needed. The blonde sat there, rubbing circles on Cheryl’s back, hoping it was having some sort of calming effect. 

“Betty, can you hold this?” FP passed her the container containing the hydroxocobalamin without waiting for her to respond. “Keep it elevated. We need to get the entire dose to her, okay?”

“I’ve got it. Go, get that bastard,” Betty said as she looked up at FP, who was already back on his feet.

He ran off; Cheryl didn’t pay attention what direction he went. Her only focus was Toni.

“She’ll be okay, Cheryl,” Betty reiterated, not sure if she was saying it for her cousin’s benefit or her own. She sat with the redhead until the paramedics arrived and wheeled Toni outside to the ambulances

Cheryl climbed in the back of the ambulance and took a seat. She grabbed hold of Toni’s hand, and refused to release her grip until they reached Riverdale General. 

“Miss, we need you to let go now,” one of the hospital staff said. She wasn’t sure if they were a doctor or a nurse, only that they were wearing powder blue scrubs. Cheryl shook her head as more tears fell from her eyes. “I need to take her for tests. The longer we wait... You need to let go. I promise we will do everything we can for her.”

Reluctantly Cheryl loosened her hold and allowed Toni to be pulled from the back of the ambulance. She watched as a team of medical professionals hastily pushed her girlfriend through the emergency room doors and out of sight.


	3. because she loves you

_BEEP_ ... _BEEP_ ... _BEEP_...

The heart rate monitor continued to beep every few seconds in a steady rhythm. Doctor Wilkins explained this was a good sign, that Toni’s heart functioning correctly on its own. All of her tests had come back clear.

Thankfully, Betty had gotten Toni’s message with not a second to spare. The blonde had immediately called FP, who rallied the deputy Serpents and the rest of the Riverdale Police Department, and the group had arrived just in time to save Toni’s life.

Cheryl had not left her girlfriend’s side since they allowed her into the room hours after they had arrived at the hospital. The redhead had immediately taken Toni’s hand in her own and refused to let go, even as nurses filtered in and out of the room to check her girlfriend’s vitals. Every so often she’d look up at the monitor or check for Toni’s pulse just to make sure she was still alive.

“Hey.”

She looked up to see her cousin standing at the doorway, a cup of coffee in each hand. “Hi, cousin.”

“I thought you might need this,” Betty said as she handed Cheryl the coffee. “It’s a cherry mocha. I wasn’t sure what you’d want so I just asked them to give me whatever cherry thing they had on the menu.”

“It’s perfect.” Cheryl accepted the cup with her free hand. She took a sip and sighed, “Thank you… I really did need this.”

The blonde nodded and turned her head towards the bed, “How is she?”

“Stable, thanks to you.”

“I just made some calls, that’s all.”

“Still,” the redhead gave a weak smile, “if it weren’t for you I’d have lost her. Thank you.”

Betty nodded and took a drink from her own cup. “FP got him you know? Edgar. He tried to drink some of that himself, but they brought enough cyanokit for pretty much the whole farm.”

“He should have let him die.”

“Maybe, but it’s his job. The Sheriff can’t really let people die.”

Cheryl scoffed at the comment. While she had long forgiven FP for his role in Jason’s death, she still had trouble wrapping her head around that the man who helped cover up her brother’s murder was now supposedly the town’s moral compass.

“He’s in the hospital somewhere on a secured floor. The place is swarming with Serpents in case anyone tries to break him out. Even after everything some of those people are still loyal to him. Evelyn is in the psych ward. That’s a whole thing… apparently she’s his _wife_. We found a bunch of files during the raid, and-”

“I don’t care!” Cheryl snapped, cutting off the blonde.

“Cheryl, I-”

“No offense, but each and every one of them can go to hell. I don’t want to hear about Edgar or Evelyn or how your boyfriend’s father saved the day. The only thing that matters to me right now is her. So please, wait to fill me in on all the twisted inner workings of the Evernevers’ minds when Toni is awake to hear it as well.”

“Sorry,” Betty responded somberly. “Is there… is there anything you need? Anything I can do?”

“Unless you know how to wake her up, no there isn’t.”

Betty nodded. “So what have the doctors said?”

The redhead wiped away tears which had begun to fall during her outburst, “Her vitals are good. They’ve been checking every half an hour to make sure there’s no change. They said you got her the treatment just in time… another minute or two later and… Apparently she’s lucky. Can you believe that? They said she was _lucky_ . All we can do now is wait for her to wake up. There’s no way to tell… to tell if she suffered any long term damage until she wakes up. _If_ she wakes up.”

“Excuse me, is one of you Cheryl Blossom?”

The girls looked up to see one a uniformed officer waiting just inside the door.

“That would be me,” Cheryl responded. She sniffled and used the sleeve of her shirt to dry her face. “Is there something you need, officer?”

“Good evening. I am Officer Gaines, and I’m here to escort you to your mandatory psych evaluation.”

The redhead shook her head, “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Every person who attended that meeting needs to go through the eval to determine if they need to be admitted for treatment. Sheriff’s orders.”

“I _said_ I’m not going anywhere. I am not leaving her bedside until ma chérie has awoken,” she persisted through clenched teeth. There was no way she would be taken away, not when Toni’s life hung in the balance.

He rolled his eyes and scoffed. “Look, if you don’t comply I will need to take you into custody.”

“I’d like to see you try,” Cheryl challenged, clearly not phased by the officer’s authority. “Please, by all means, attempt to pry me away. I _dare_ you.”

The man sighed and reached behind his belt to unhook his handcuffs, “Please do not make use these.”

“Wait,” Betty spoke up, her attention quickly alternating between the two. “You said these orders came from the sheriff?”

“Yes, now can _you_ please convince your friend to come with me?”

“She’s not leaving,” the blonde reiterated. “Can’t you see her girlfriend is in that bed? Call FP. He will straighten it out.”

“I’m not bothering him over one kid. Let’s go,” he ordered as he took steps towards Cheryl.

Betty moved herself between the officer and her cousin, “Call him, or I will.”

“Look, I don’t have time for this. I’m under strict orders. She comes with me or gets arrested. No exceptions. Sorry, but I’m not about to let some random teenagers tell me how to do my job.”

“Well my _boyfriend_ happens Sheriff Jones’s son. And that girl in the bed,” Betty gestured to Toni, “your boss happens to love her like a daughter. So, _maybe_ just this once you should make an exception.”

Betty stared down the man. It was as if the blonde was playing a game of chicken in the middle of the urgent care center, waiting for the man to break first. It paid off when he scowled, shook his head, and pressed the button on the com device hooked to his uniform lapel.

“Hey, Sheriff? Gaines here. I have someone refusing their eval.”

FP’s voice came through the speaker, “I explained the orders perfectly clear, didn’t I?”

He looked to the girls giving a knowing smirk and raised an eyebrow as if he had just proved something. “Yes, sir, but there’s a blonde girl here insisting I call you. She’s preventing me from taking the other into custody. Should I bring them both down to the station?”

“Who is it refusing to go for their psych evaluation?”

“Blossom,” Gaines answered.

“Leave her, and move on to the next name on your list.”

The officer’s expresion changed instantly. Gone was his cocky glare, now replaced with confusion and hostility. “But, sir.”

“That’s an order, officer. She was excused, and if you had paid attention during the briefing you’d have known that already.”

He lowered his hand from the receiver and glared. “Looks like you’re off the hook.”

“Guess it’s a good thing you listened to some random teenagers then isn’t it,” Betty commented as she flashed a boastful smile.

Gains glowered before turning and exiting the room without muttering another word.

“Thank you for that, cousin,” Cheryl said humbly as she looked up at the blonde.

Betty shrugged, “I knew FP wouldn’t want you to worry about that right now. I didn’t realize he cleared you completely, and I think we just got that guy fired.”

Cheryl cracked a smile, “He should have paid attention in the briefing.” The pair laughed slightly for a moment before the redhead sighed and returned to her reverent state. “What am I supposed to do?”

“I don’t know. If it had been Jug…”

“I can’t lose her, Betty,” Cheryl agonized. “This is all my fault. She joined that stupid Farm for me. She shouldn’t be here.” Tears sprung from the redhead’s eyes.

“If she hadn’t been there, _you’d_ have died, Cheryl,” her cousin reminded her. “My mom may have died, Polly, your niece and nephew. _Everyone_ could have died.”

“She p-promised me, Betty,” the redhead sobbed. “She p-promised she w-wouldn’t leave. She promised I w-wasn’t g-going to be al-alone again. Why? W-why did s-she lie? Sh-she p-promised!”

The blonde took a step closer and gently placed her hand on Cheryl’s shoulder. She rubbed small circles with her thumb, unsure of how to proceed. “Can I...I mean, would you like a hug?”

Cheryl nodded as she wiped away the tears continuing to flow freely down her face.

Betty wrapped her arms around her cousin’s shoulders and held her. “Toni is a _hero_ ,” she reminded Cheryl. “I know you’re mad at the world right now, but don’t get mad at her for this. She didn’t want to leave you; you _know_ that.”

“T-then why? Why d-did she do this?”

“She did it for you, Cheryl. Toni may have saved hundreds of people tonight, but she did it for you.”

 

Cheryl barely got any sleep over the next few days, and when she did it was only because she was too exhausted to keep her eyes open any longer. She would slump over in the chair and pass out for a few hours before being awoken by one of the nurses coming in to check Toni’s vitals.

Nearly all of their friends came by the hospital to check on the girls. The Vixens, the Pretty Poisons, and even the Serpents made appearances. Betty stopped by every morning with fresh coffee and breakfast from Pop’s. Jughead had accompanied her on one visit, and while Cheryl still felt animosity towards him, she had to admit she appreciated the company. Josie texted multiple times for updates since she was currently with her dad, mid tour, and unable to return to Riverdale.

Veronica had went by Thistlehouse the morning after Toni had been admitted and packed a bag for Cheryl containing a few changes of clothes, her phone charger, and necessary toiletries as the redhead continued to be adminantly against leaving Toni’s bedside. The only time she stepped away from the chair she had been basically living out of was when one of their friends was there to take her place. That way if Toni did wake up during the short time she was away she wouldn’t be alone. Cheryl would quickly use the bathroom in Toni’s room to shower and change before going back to her uncomfortable seat and returning her girlfriend’s hand to her own.

“She’ll be okay,” Sweet Pea told her. “Tiny has always been a fighter.”

Cheryl nodded, “She has to be. I don’t know what I’ll do if she’s not.”

Fangs looked on wordlessly from across the room, eyes fixated on the pink haired girl in the bed. He was leaning up against the air conditioning unit with Kevin by his side. The two were figuring out what their relationship meant without the Farm, but each boy was grateful for the other’s presence while trying to cope with the ordeal. It remained to be seen if they’d make it work, but for now just being together was enough for them.

“I’m going to get some coffee,” Kevin whispered to his boyfriend. “Want anything?”

Fangs shook his head, and a single tear escaped from his eye.

Kevin reached up and used his thumb to wipe away the fallen tear before leaning in and placing a kiss on the other boy’s cheek in its place. “Be right back.” He walked over to where the others sat, “Hey, I’m going to run down to the cafeteria. Can I get you anything, Cheryl?”

The redhead shook her head, “Thank you, Kev. I appreciate it.”

“I’ll go with you,” Sweet Pea said as he stood up and pushed the chair he had been sitting in back against the wall.

“I think I’ll go too. It’s… I just can’t…” Fangs trailed off, not able to find the words to say. He had been a mess since the ascension, and seeing Toni laying motionless in the bed was destroying him.

“Why don’t you all go home?” Cheryl asked. “I appreciate you coming, truly, but I’ll be okay. You can come back tomorrow. Maybe there will have been a change.”

“Call if you need anything,” Kevin instructed as he leaned down to embrace her.

“I will, thanks.”

The two Serpents each gave her a hug before walking to the other side of Toni’s bed.

Sweet Pea leaned down and placed a kiss on top of Toni’s head, “Get back to us, Tiny. You aren’t allowed to leave like this… not while… not while shit’s all messed up between us. You fight, okay? Come home.”

The shorter Serpent broke down completely and turned into his boyfriend’s waiting embrace, who held him as he sobbed. Kevin gave Cheryl a weak smile over Fangs’s shoulder before helping escort him out of the room.

“Call if there’s a change? Please?” Sweet Pea asked.

Cheryl nodded in response, “Of course, and I’m sorry… about-”

“Nonissue,” he cut her off. “Seriously, Red. I’ve had my ass kicked more times than I can count, and we’ve got more important things to worry about.” He looked down at Toni again before tapping his hand on the guard rail twice. Taking a deep breath, Sweet Pea tried to compose himself before he started crying like his friend. “Right. I’ll leave her in your hands then. Talk to you tomorrow.”

The redhead watched as he exited the room to join Fangs and Kevin in the hall. Her attention drifted back to Toni the moment they were alone. She needed her girlfriend to come back. Every day that passed caused her fear that Toni may never wake up to grow. Cheryl felt truly lost without her.

“I’m sorry. I am _so_ sorry, Toni,” she said, praying her girlfriend could hear her. “I need you. Come back to me.”

 

Darkness. That’s all she felt. Complete darkness. Toni remembered slipping away, falling really, from the light as she descended further and further into nothingness. She had known she was dying; she accepted her fate the second she drank from that cursed chalice. What she had not expected was to be so aware. Expecting everything to just stop, to instantly cease existing, it surprised her when her consciousness still seemed intact, processing every moment.

The last thing she could remember was Cheryl holding her close and begging her to fight.

_“I love you s-so much. Y-you’re the m-most import-important p-person in m-my life, Toni. D-don’t go.”_

She couldn’t hold on, the pull was too strong. It was as if she was being caught up in a riptide, the waters of the river Styx carrying her into the abyss.

And then… everything stopped.

She wasn’t dead, but she couldn’t find a way back to the light either. She was stuck in a void of nothingness, a limbo between this life and the next.

There was no way to how much time had passed. Did time exist where she was? Toni didn’t know. She couldn’t move. There was no way to go backwards or forwards. Everything was standing still, _time_ was standing still. It wasn’t peaceful, it was... unnerving.

“Come back to me.”

_Cheryl?_

Hearing the voice jolted her attention. It felt so long since she heard anything but the sound of her own inner thoughts. She knew that voice. Toni had been trying to recreate the sound of it in her mind, and hearing it now overwhelmed her. If crying was possible where she was, she would have burst in tears.

“Please, baby. I need you.”

_I’m trying. I don’t know how._

Toni thought she had to be imagining her girlfriend’s voice. There is no way she could be there with her in the nothingness, but it sounded so _real_. She didn’t even know if Cheryl was alive. There was no way to know if her sacrifice had worked. Edgar could have forced her to drink it, and Toni’s act would have been for nothing. She needed to know if her girlfriend was okay. If she knew maybe then she could move on and find peace. Maybe that’s what was keeping her trapped in the darkness, her unfinished business of not knowing if she saved her girl.

“Sweet Pea, Fangs, and Kevin came by today. Fangs is really torn up. He seems to be handling this as well as I am.”

_Sweet Pea wasn’t at the Farm? Came by where? Cheryl where are you?_

“I need you to wake up. I can’t do this without you.”

_Wake up? She’s alive. Cheryl’s alive._

Relief flooded her. It had worked. Her girlfriend was alive. She saved her.

“Open your eyes, TT.”

_Open my eyes? Am I alive? I can’t be._

She felt pressure that reverberated and echoed through her subconscious. It was like a sonic wave washing over her. Feeling… she felt it. She felt… _something_. Whatever it was it felt familiar. It felt warm… inviting… it felt like home.

_What was that?_

“Please, come back to me, ma moitié. I love you.”

 

Cheryl’s pressed another kiss to her Toni’s forehead before pulling away and sitting back into her chair. She took a deep breath in hopes to compose herself. The redhead felt useless, and for some reason talking to Toni helped her feel like she was at least doing something.

A soft whimper came from the bed. It was so quiet, Cheryl thought she imagined it. Then a second, more louder, sound came from Toni’s throat.

“Toni? Baby, can you hear me? I’m right here, mon amour.” Tears pooled in the redhead’s eyes. She wasn’t sure if they were of relief or desperation.

“ _Ch_ …”

She completely stood from the chair and reached up to cradle Toni’s face with the hand not entwined with her girlfriend’s.

“ _Ch-ch_ …”

“That’s it,” Cheryl cried, the tears falling down her face. She felt a slight squeeze on the hand holding Toni’s and gasped. She nodded frantically, “You’re okay. Just wake up.”

“ _Cher_ ,” Toni exhaled, her eyes still shut. “ _Ch-Cheryl_.”

“I’m right here, ma chérie,” she smiled so wide her face hurt.

The pink haired girl’s eyelids began to twitch before ultimately fluttering open. She blinked a few times as she adjusted to the harsh light of the hospital room before turning her head and finding her girlfriend’s loving gaze.

“Is this heaven?” Toni asked. Her voice was hoarse and barely louder than a whisper. After not talking in days her throat felt dry, and it was hard to speak.

“Oh my god,” the redhead began laughing, not able to properly process the intense emotions she was feeling. It was pure euphoria. All her worries instantly washed away. “No, baby. You’re alive. You’re okay.”

Toni groggily shook her head, “Can’t be.”

Cheryl raised the hand on her girlfriend’s face and stroked her hair, “You are, TT, and you can’t scare me like that ever again.”

“How?”

“Betty got your message,” the redhead explained. “She called FP, and they got there in time.”

“I’m alive?” Toni asked in disbelief. When she downed the cup she never anticipated surviving. “I’m really alive?”

Cheryl nodded enthusiastically as she leaned down to press her lips to her girlfriend’s. Her lips gently, trying to pour as much love into the kiss as possible. She needed Toni to know how thankful she was to have her back and how she never wanted to be that close to losing her again. As she pulled back after breaking contact, she sighed happily, “I love you.”

“Mm, love you too.”

“I need to page the doctor,” the taller girl said as she reached over Toni’s body to grab the bedside remote. She hit the call button for the nurses station, and a red light turned on behind the bed.

“Hello?” called a voice through the receiver.

“She’s awake,” Cheryl answered happily. “Can someone call Doctor Wilkins?”

“I will call him, and the on call nurse will be right in.” The connection closed with a blip of static, and the light turned off. A moment later a team of nurses came in and immediately swarmed Toni’s bed. Cheryl was forced to take a step back and release Toni’s hand as the staff collected updated information for her chart.

Her doctor arrived a short time later and ordered additional tests, which thankfully all came back clear. He thought it best to keep her for observation for an additional 48 hours, but if no new symptoms arose she would be cleared to go home.

While the medical professionals had been fretting over her girlfriend, Cheryl used the time to text their friends to let everyone know Toni had woken up. She was met with a wave of relieved responses and promises to stop by the next day to see her. Everyone seemed to understand the two needed time alone before being bombarded with visitors.

Only one person stopped by that evening after hearing the news, and if his visited could have waited until the following day he would have. FP arrived shortly after Toni returned from her prescribed scans. He explained he needed her statement for his report and apologized multiple times for forcing her to relive what happened. Toni didn’t mind. If what she had to say helped put the Evernevers behind bars for the rest of their lives, she was more than happy to assist.

He filled the girls in on everything that happened, Toni listening attentively to every word. After a short-lived foot pursuit, Edgar had been apprehended by FP. The cult leader had tried to take the easy way out, having downed his own cup of cyanide laced Fresh-Aid just as the sheriff burst into the room. An antidote was administered, and he currently resided a few floors above them, handcuffed to his hospital bed. Having received his treatment so soon after ingesting the poison, Edgar had woken up days earlier.

FP had been the one to question him once he woke up, and Edgar had begrudgingly explained the Farm had been a twenty year long game of Gryphons & Gargoyles. He had been dealt the “Cult Leader” card in high school and devoted his life to accomplishing his mission in order to ascend. To win he had to persuade a mass following to complete a united ascension. He had been so close to his goal after two decades of work. If it hadn't been for Toni, he would have succeeded.

Evelyn was currently in the hospital’s psych ward. Through fingerprint records they learned her real name was Taylor Reyes. She had been seduced by Edgar during her sophomore year of high school, while he was over ten years her senior. The two had wed right after her 18th birthday. For the last ten years she had been recruiting for him to build the Farm’s ranks. She had been diagnosed with a form of Stockholm Syndrome, as she still claimed undying love and devotion to him. Her parents were with her now. They had been shocked to learn their daughter was alive, having believed she died once the five year anniversary of her disappearance had passed.

The men who had restrained Fangs and Kevin, along with the rest of the men in white who had passed out the cups of poisoned Fresh-Aid, were members of Edgar’s inner circle, whose primary allegiance was to the Gargoyle King. FP’s team managed to bring them all into custody, and each of them were currently sitting in lockup at the precinct, along with any other Farmies who attempted to aid Edgar during the raid.

All of the other members of the Farm, with the exception of Cheryl and Toni, had been required to go through a mandatory psych evaluation to determine if they were fit to return home or be admitted to the hospital under suicide watch. Many of the members no longer had no homes to go to and ended up seeking refuge with friends.

FP stood from his chair in an effort to leave after his detailed explanation of the previous days’ happenings. He grabbed his hat and returned to his head, said his goodbyes, and took a step towards the door.

“Wait,” Toni called after him, not wanting him to leave without expressing her gratitude. “Thank you, ya know, for saving my life.”

He turned and gave her a tight lipped smile, “You know how much you mean to me, Toni. You may not be a Serpent anymore, but you’ll always be family. I’m just glad I managed to get there in time.”

Once they were finally alone, Toni turned to her girlfriend. “How are you doing, Cher?” Her voice was still softer than normal, but she was sounding far more like herself than she did when she had first awoken.

“Of course you’d worry how I’m feeling when you are the one who was poisoned,” Cheryl quipped.

“Babe, I’m serious.” The shorter girl sighed, knowing this would be a difficult thing for her girlfriend to talk about, “How are you feeling about… um…”

“About my brother being dead?”

Toni swallowed and nodded, “Yeah. I know you thought you had him back. You had to go through losing him all over again.”

Cheryl pressed her lips into a thin line as her eyes began to water. “I did, but it didn’t hurt as much as thinking I lost you. I mourned my brother already, and I would give just about anything to have him back. I should have never been willing to give you up though. Watching you… thinking you were dying… that was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to go though. I thought a ghost was more important than you, and I’ll regret that for the rest of my life.”

“You didn’t think he was ghost, Cher,” Toni reminds her. “You really thought he was back. I understand what you did, even if it hurt. If I had the chance to bring my parents back I’d probably make some stupid decisions too.” She reached up to cradle the redhead’s face in her hand.

“Even if it meant giving me up?”

“I could never give you up,” she replied.

“I’m so ashamed, TT,” Cheryl exhaled. “I _tried_ to give you up, and you still wanted to be with me. I don’t deserve you… I never did.”

“Babe,” Toni dropped her hand and took Cheryl’s in her own, squeezing it as she did. “I love you. There aren’t words to explain how much I love you. Maybe there are; I don’t know. My vocabulary isn’t as big as yours. I almost died because I couldn’t imagine living in a world without you in it. You’re it for me, Cher. Don’t ever say you don’t deserve me. If anything, I don’t deserve _you_ . I would do _literally_ anything for you, even drink poison apparently.”

“Don’t joke about that,” the redhead scolded. “Never joke about that. I thought I lost you.”

“You’re saying I can’t ever bring up the most selfless thing I’ve ever done? That hardly seems fair,” Toni smirked.

“I’m not going to be okay with that for quite a while.”

“How long?”

Cheryl raised an eyebrow, “How long until I’m okay with you casually joking about almost dying?”

“Yeah, how long?”

“I don’t know? Ten years,” the redhead answered.

Toni smiled, “So what I’m hearing is you want to keep me around for at least ten years?”

“Oh… um..” suddenly Cheryl found herself not able to speak. “I mean… If y-you don’t-”

“Babe, as cute as you are right now, let me stop you okay? I would _love_ to be around for ten years, or twenty or thirty. I _just_ said you were it for me. I meant that,” she smiled and bit down on her lower lip momentarily before continuing. “Sorta just got a second chance at living, and I don’t want to waste it.”

“Great, now I’m crying again,” the redhead laughed as she dried her face. “This was supposed to stop now that you’re alright.”

“As long as they are good tears,” Toni reached up and rubbed Cheryl’s cheek with her thumb. “I love you, Cheryl.”

“I love you too, ma moitié,” she the taller girl replied.

Toni squinted, “Have you called me that before? It sounds familiar.”

“You heard me? I said that while you were still comatose, right before you woke up.”

“That wasn’t a dream?”

The redhead looked at her inquisitively, “What wasn’t?”

“I heard your voice. You were asking me to come back to you. Was that real?”

Cheryl gasped.

“I’m guessing it was real then?”

All Cheryl could do was nod as she felt moisture once again returned to her eyes.

“You helped me find my way back, Cher. You helped me get back to you,” the pink haired girl explained. Toni scooted closer to the side of the bed, leaving room for Cheryl, “Get up here.”

“I don’t think the hospital allows two people in those,” the redhead commented.

The pink haired girl patted the empty spot next to her, “Don’t care. I almost died, and I want to cuddle my girlfriend. They can just deal.”

Cheryl rolled her eyes and smiled before crawling into the bed next to Toni. She rested her head just under her girlfriend’s shoulder as Toni’s arms enveloped her.

“Mm, this is nice.”

“And I don’t think I’ve said this yet, but thank you for saving me, TT. Thank you for saving everyone.”

Toni leaned down and kissed her girlfriend’s brow, “I’d do anything for you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you to everyone who left kudos or comments! i suck at responding but ive read every message left. i hope you all enjoyed this fic (and did anyone really expect me to kill toni? i couldnt do that)
> 
> for those who don't know this idea was partly inspired by the jonestown massacre where the phrase "drinking the kool aid" originated


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